sino ka ba para umasa?
sino ka ba para tuparin nya ang mga pangakong
walang laman na katotohanan?
sino ka ba?

Panandalian, pamatid uhaw, pangkalang sa kumakalam
na damdamin.
Ikaw, oo ikaw! Ikaw na buong puso at buong tapat na nagbigay pagpapahalaga

umaasa sa salitang binitiwan tulad ng tayo, kasama at wagas na paulit ulit mong sinasambit
hanggang maililok sa aking puso't isip.

Paano na?
Tapos ka na, Tapos ka na sa pangagnalingan ng pakiramdam na di ka nagiisa, na ikaw ay mahalaga.
Tapos ka na, at eto ako nagiisa.
naglilinis ng naglalawa na damdamin na di kayang saluhin ng pusong nagiisa.

Simula na.
Ito na marahil ang hudyat na dapat ako ay maglakbay na.
Papalayo sa trahedya ng gyera at guho ng pusong umaasa, umasa, aasa.
tama na.

How Dare You Make Me Fall For You

Sometimes, Sorry is the most painful word that you'd hear

When there's nothing more to say, when there's nothing more that can be done.
When everything comes crashing down.
When you are not in control, not the one in command.

How dare you make me fall for you.
Make me cross that horizon that darkness embraces, that I can't see what is beyond

Right when I was about to take that step that I dare not to take,
you push back and tell me that you didn't mean a word you said.

I know that I am broken.
But Honey I'll get over this.
Honey I know I'll bounce.
Honey, I'll bounce.  

Remembering What I Learned From Friends

When I was younger I often watch American TV shows. My favorite shows are Melrose Place - until mom prohibited me from watching it because of some well a lot of scenes, Beverly Hills 90210, Baywatch and of course who didn't watch, FRIENDS.

I was amazed how these group of people live in a place without their parents or relatives but just their friends. I figured out that they were around thirty-ish year old guys, I mean they have a job and can stand on their own, they seem to be stable so I guess 30 is a good figure.

And oh yeah, this made me want to live in New York before.

I romanticized with the possibility of me living alone without anyone just me and my house, my own rules with no oppositions. I can do whatever I can.

This I remember earlier this day. Thank God for letting me remember.


should have spent more time trying to be famous... LOL
see my TV appearance here
For the past few years I got the feeling of my life has gone no where because of a broken relationship that was the foundation of my plans. A wife, my kid, those white picket fences, that big red door and a swing hanging up on the tree in my yard. I was feeling I am too old to start a new, but FRIENDS reminded me that I am wrong. I am just starting my life.

I realized that I grew up and matured way too fast, got too serious too soon. Not that I am saying that it is bad nor that I regret it, but it was the reason why I missed a lot of things that I could have done with my hands clean.

Maybe I should have balanced my future plans and my right now plans. I falter on the latter, I just thought of tomorrow, when I was at my right now. The result, I didn't live a life on my right now moments and when my future plans crumbled, nothing was to lived for at all. Devastated, I had to start back at 1.

or maybe explored the world some more! maybe ill write another post about my should have beens :)

But then again, FRIENDS told me that life begins at 30 (at least that is what I percieve), when you should have the most freedom that you can get, the time that you have enough strength yet responsible enough with your adventures in life. It is a time that you can be who you want to be and are.

This is life as I want it to be, no need to rush.

Words For The Young (and I mean like you 20 plus year old kids)

I guess the best thing that I have learned is to balance your future plans and how you live your life at the moment. Be thrifty but do not deprive your selves. Reward your selves, do the things that you can do, do not delay. Then again, prepare for the rainy days. Invest -should have learned this earlier in life, don't just save.

Don't be afraid to play.

Today I start my life again. with a new mindset, a new view in life.

Life is how you want to see it.

This is me now.

Recognizing my Humanity

it's okay to feel sad, angry, cheated or whatever that it is you feel, I tell my self. They are emotions, they make you human , without emotions you are just an animal or maybe even just an insect.

Today I recognized my humanity. I stayed quite and think. I feel - sad, angry and alone.

In the end it will only be me who will stand for me in times of trouble just as how it always happens.

have i forgotten how to feel loved or have i ever felt it before, do I even know how it is. A different kind of love.